The Weight of Breastfeeding

Avalina Elise

Days 10-13

So, because I am being completely honest here, or at least trying to be, I have to dedicate a moment or two to one of my faults, vanity. I am totally vain when it comes to my weight. I think for me it was something that was instilled in me when I was younger. I was a size 0-2 for many many years. Not that I was the healthiest of people at that weight and please don’t think that my goal is to get back to that. I am being realistic! Although, it would be pretty awesome! Of course as you get older you put on more weight and when you are older and having babies it gets harder and harder to lose your baby weight. I am truly blessed though, my body tends to bounce back pretty quickly from having babies, however, I always get stuck with 8-10 pounds to lose that just seems impossible to get rid of. (When you are 5 feet tall this can show A LOT)Which is what I am faced with now and to make matters worse, there is a family wedding coming up very fast! Of course there are pressures, in my own mind, to look as I did before I was pregnant for that. AHHHHH! I am breastfeeding, which so helps with the initial weight loss, but after a while you plateau and you have to keep your calories up in order to provide the sufficient nutrients your baby needs…..I can’t start running yet, maybe in another week. So mentally, it is messing with me a little bit. SO, on top of the baby blues I am now having this that I have decided to deal with. Good Times! Say a prayer for my kids and Patrick…They totally need it!

So breastfeeding, some people LOVE it, some people HATE it. My experiences have lead me to fall somewhere in between. Vanity speaking, I LOVE that it burns so many calories with very little effort. I HATE that I have yet to have a baby latch correctly, so I have had the sorest boobs ever! This makes it a less than a wonderful experience. I am the type of person that I don’t mind breastfeeding, but I am very self conscious of how other people feel about it. I usually go into another room or into a bathroom if we are out so that I don’t make other people uncomfortable. I am pumping but with all of my kids I have had a strict no bottles until 4 weeks old. We have made some exceptions but its usually right around that 4 week mark. So feeling like I am missing something is usually a factor. This is the first time that I have incorporated pumping into my whole breastfeeding routine. I have always tried to add it later and it has never worked out for me. So, I decided to try something new. So far it seems to be working pretty well. I was inspired by a friend of mine that has about a gagillion ounces pumped. There will be more than enough for her daughter to make it through her 20^th birthday. Can you tell I have pumping envy? My problem has always been that around months 4-8 I don’t produce as much milk as is needed for my babies to feel full. So I end up supplementing, which makes me feel like I am cheating them out of something, not to mention its really expensive! So I am hoping that pumping 4-5oz a day (this is nothing compared to my friends 12oz in a sitting!) will help me out when I hit that 4 month mark. That is if I don’t use it all for date nights!

Ava is just such an easy baby. She has a pretty good schedule now, she still sleeps a lot during the day and is a cluster feeder between 6pm & 11pm. This actually works out really well for our family, although it does ground us a little in the evenings. She has her 2 week appointment next week so we will see what happens with that.

My family is/has adjusted pretty well. My Littles are still little tsunamis that run through the house destroying everything in their path. The highlight of their destruction has been Patrick’s coveted Plumeria tree that he has been growing for the last 4 years. Dirt & leaves EVERYWHERE!! Hopefully it has been saved and is now on top of the island. However, when Avalina is around they are the most precious little mothers. Celeste is actually getting better and Stella worse. We are hoping that we can start potty training them both soon. Hmmmm that should be fun! Me, I am doing ok, I am still having moments of weepy times but not for any particular reason. I am still freaked out by social situations I have to work on that. There will be more soon. Be Well!